Monday, September 7, 2015

If You Build It, They Will Come

      By Advice Columnist, Cathy Harris,

Sep. 7, 2015

Hello everyone:

I finally had a chance to watch the movie, "Field of Dreams" starring Kevin Costner, where the theme was "If You Build It, They Will Come." The movie illustrates one of the biggest business killing myths out there. Many business owners believe that once they open the doors of their business, then customers will simply pour in.

This typically doesn't happen. If you do not market and sell your services and products, not only will they not come, but they won't even notice. However, this e-newlsetter and blog post today is not about business but it's about how everyone can move forward and truly create the type of life that they deserve.

A couple of years ago, I was part of a panel discussion with several whistleblowers. One whistleblower on the panel made the statement that "We live in a world where we are at risk for a nuclear holocaust." The statement really got me thinking. Are we at risk of a nuclear holocaust?

Mainstream media today portrays the world as if we are in our last days. Their scare tactics and fear mongering have turned many people inwards causing them to live their lives in a state of denial and hopelessness instead of in peace, joy and happiness.

At one time over 30% of people moved around to other areas in this country but after the 2007/2008 financial crisis, that figure rose dramatically because many families were forced to leave their homes because of unethical realtors and others in the financial and banking industry.

Even the Census Bureau, another dysfunctional governmental agency, who according to whistleblowers, have always came up with their own figures, don't have a sense of who is where or how long they have been there.

Many people and families would like to leave their areas -- where they live -- and move some place else. What everyone should do is create their own villages - a group of 5, 10, 15, 20 or more friends - to associate with -- and use and other social media websites to create neighborhoods and communities again. It's not impossible to use these groups to do this.

However, when building communities, you must remember that the person you are today depends on who you associate yourself with. If you wish to become self-sufficient and become a business owner, then you need to be associated with other business owners and form business alliances, strategic partnerships, co-ops, and joint ventures.

If you wish to help others learn how to grow their own foods again, then you need to be associated with business owners and others in organic communities. Associations are extremely important today especially when it comes to young people because peer pressure can be extremely hard.

Whomever you are associating yourself with, needs to bring timely and relevant information into your circle. The goal is to love and take care of one another. If you are a single mother living across country and you know you don't have a support system, then by all means move closer to family so they can help you out.

However, with all the technology today, especially skype, where you can visually see your loved ones on some type of computer, laptop, IPad or handheld gadget, you don't have to be in the same neighborhood with your loved ones in order to be a part of their lives.

I can't tell you how many people have approach me since I moved to Austin, TX, one year ago, from Atlanta, GA, and asked me -- why did I leave Atlanta to move here? So many people I met since arriving here, is obviously not happy -- so they need to figure out what they need to do.

I read an article the other day that said next to California, Austin, TX has one of the largest natural, holistic and organic communities around so I am where I need to be in my life right now. This is exactly what I was looking for.

A month ago when watching Super Soul Sunday on the Oprah Own Network, I found out one of the founders of Wholefood Stores is located in Austin -- so to me living here is ideal.

What part of the country do you want to live? This is a question that needs to be asked by everyone and they should in turn come up with a good answer.

As I age gracefully, I did not want to live in such a large city like Atlanta. I was seeking a more calmer environment so I could concentrate more on what I really wanted to do with my life.

Plus all my beautiful and close friends, my village, had passed on -- so why would I continue to stay in a city where I had no village or support system?

I have lost at least 40 of my friends in my life -- so don't forget to check up on the Seniors in your family because many will lose friends and become isolated as they age.

This city, Austin, TX, not only has a large natural, holistic and organic community but also a large metaphysical community -- so again -- I AM HOME -- and home is where the heart is!!!

I can't believe all the local groups here -- so you will never get bored. After a year of checking out everything, I just launched 3 groups myself - Austin's Empowered Women - 40 and Above; Austin's Holistic and Natural Community; and Austin's Writing Club -- in order to create my own villages and communities here.

It doesn't matter which part of the country you live in, there are good people everywhere so get out there and create connections and your own villages.

Not only are many of the local events here connected to a group, but they even have groups to organize the groups here. Can you believe that?

And many of the group organizers are offering services and products and making a living right out of their own homes. You can't do this in most cities especially large cities because of crime -- so again, Austin is an ideal spot for anyone seeking to grow themselves -- mentally, physically or spiritually.

So now you have no excuse not to get out there and build a community that you can truly love because after all -- if you build it, they will come.


Cathy Harris, Speaker, Author, Coach
Angels Press, CEO, President, Publisher
Public Speakers Association, Austin Downtown Location (Coming Soon) 
Austin, TX 78760
(512) 909-7365 (Seminars, Workshops, Webinars, Coaching) (Empowerment & Publishing Company) (Advice Columnist) (The Cathy Harris Story)

Join us today....
Cathy Harris 
New Groups
in Austin, TX 

This Mastermind group for women was created for women in the Austin, TX area - 40 and over who is ready to empower themselves mentally, physically and spiritually by coming together, sharing information, bartering services, etc. 

Women are the CEOs of their families and the local Austin, TX community offers many opportunities to become involved and change the world so we will offer empowerment opportunities for the entire family. 

Since women buy groceries, it will take women and pet owners to pass GMO labeling laws in this country. We will offer classes, seminars, workshops and webinars on timely and relevant topics. Join us today!

This is Austin, TX community of Holistic, Naturopathic and Alternative Medicine Healers including Farmer's Markets; Organic Farmers; Non-GMO Educators; Natural Hair Stylists; Herbalists; Food Allergy Specialists; Acupuncturists; Kinesiologists; Natural Health Consultants and Coaches; Body Consciousness Healers; Mental Fitness Coaches; Health Store Owners; Holistic Energy Healers; Massage Therapists; Yoga Instructors; Body Healing Meditation; etc.

Foods affects every area of your life -- from your mood, to your behavior, to your happiness and your entire quality of life. So the main focus of this group will be how families can gain access to good food, while avoiding Genetically Modified Organisms (GMOs), aka FrankenFoods, and live a holistic and natural lifestyle. So join us today!

We will offer classes, seminars, workshops, webinars and other training to educate the entire family. 

Are you ready to change the world through your writings? This group was created to inspire everyone to change the world through their own writings. If you have a knack for writing or would like to learn how, then join us today.

We are especially looking for all aspiring writers, authors, poets, publishers, ghostwriters, editors, proofreaders, typesetters, copywriters, freelancers, syndicated columnists, bloggers, screenwriters, etc.

We will hold writing and publishing seminars, workshops, webinars, book discussions, writing retreats, and Let's Read Campaigns. Join us and change the world through your own writings.

Thursday, August 13, 2015

My Move Up North: The East Coast Hustle

By Advice Columnist, Cathy Harris,

August 10, 2015

We can't stay silent in matters of the heart.  I have meant to tell this story for a while now to educate everyone on why many people today can't be trusted and why you need to speak up for yourself and for others.

After being on the road for an entire year and visiting 15 states in 2013, and after living in Tampa, FL for 6 months, I decided to move up north to Philadelphia b efore eventually moving to Austin, TX in July 2014.
Since I was only going to be living in the Philly area for 6 months, I rented out a room by phone from a potential landlord, an African American woman, through a referral from another person.  

Many people today have rooms to rent in their homes or on their properties for $400 to $450 a month.  This usually comes with utilities and many times cable and the internet.

But when I arrived in Philly in June 2014 in the wee hours of the night, I found out the room that I had rented did not even have an air conditioner or a ceiling fan.  

Being from the south, 20 years in Atlanta, I did not know to ask beforehand about these things.  I just simply thought it was part of the accommodations.  

So despite buying two box fans, the fans did nothing but blow out hot air.  Also the landlord did not bother to tell me that she had a beauty parlor on the premises in which I would have to be subjected to smelling toxic chemicals.

What I am wondering is how did these landlords up north get these properties to rent in the first place?  Are they just collecting money for other landlords (aka slumlords) or do they own these properties outright? 

I spoke with three other potential landlords, African American women, who had rooms for rent in their homes but they had animals and did not even bother to clean their homes before inviting in a potential tenant. 

What I saw in most of these landlords' eyes were the desperation to pay their bills.  They all had grown children in their 20s, especially male children, still living with them who should have had their own businesses and been out on their own.  However, I do understand the issues today.

Just Some of the Alarming U.S. Statistics Today:

*        20% of American families do not have one single family member employed at this time.
*        One out of every six men in their prime (25 to 54) do not have a job.
*        More than 20% of children are living in poverty.
*        Over a million public school children are homeless.
*        53% of wage earners makes less than $30,000 a year.
*        Half of all college graduates are still relying on their parents for financial support even after being out of school for 2 years.

Renting out a room in your home or basement is a great way to keep your head above water in this fallen economy.  However, no matter how hard things get, you still can't just treat people any kind of way.  Many of these potential landlords had extremely bad customer service skills and thought they could talk to you any kind of way.

Everyone continued to tell me that a ceiling fan would not be enough to keep my room cool, so I still looked at the options of moving somewhere else or buying an air conditioner.  

First the landlord told me because of the old style windows I could not put an air conditioner in the windows.  Then I asked about the air conditioner that you can just sit in your room.

She had an answer for everything.  The landlord told me that I could not have a ceiling fan and air conditioner both in my room because it would be too much electric power in one room (in other words...her light bill would go up).

I can't believe these landlords in the north who think that they can rent these rooms out without sufficient air in the summer and heat in the winter.  

This is inhumane treatment and agencies like the Department of HUD should be notified of these types of livings conditions.  These are nothing but code violations and these landlords need to be exposed.
People are not animals and they don't deserve to be put in inhumane conditions just so some landlord (aka slumlord) can live in some other neighborhood in their air conditioned house or condo and make money -- while many, especially senior citizens, lay in these rooms day and night in horrible living conditions. 

In the summer months, many people in the north are staying inside trying to stay cool simply because they are very, very uncomfortable.  I see why people up north, especially senior citizens, do not live long compared to people in the south.  I also see why people move to the south. 

If you are in a steady mode or position where everything in your life centers around keeping cool or keeping warm, then you can't really do much of anything else in your life.

In the end I decided to leave the entire state after three realtors did not respond back to me in a timely manner.  But right before I left, the landlord had placed ceiling fans in all the rooms -- so I was extremely happy about that for my other two female roommates, who had obviously chosen not to speak up about the issue. 

Remember some people will come into your life not just for a season...but for a reason. 

My message to all you landlords out there is -- you must have the decency to provide affordable housing with sufficient air and heat to your tenants, especially seniors, because it's the humane thing to do.

Cathy Harris is an Advice Columnist at, an Empowerment and Motivational Speaker, Non-GMO Health and Wellness Expert, Self-Publishing and Business Coach and the author of over 20 non-fiction books including 4 health books and can be contacted through her empowerment company, Angels Press, P.O. Box 19282, Austin, TX, 78760, 
She is available for seminars, workshops, webinars and coaching at

Copyright 2015 Cathy Harris. All Rights Reserved 

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Is Social Media Advancing or Hindering You From Living Your Dreams?

By Advice Columnist, Cathy Harris,

July 8, 2015

I am trying to stop writing and speak more but writing is my life force. It is what drives my passion which is to help others.  Social media can be overwhelming for many, including me, however, all business owners should be utilizing social media especially to market their own businesses or toot their own horn. 

This year as part of my New Year's Resolutions, I got off many of the groups that I was on for the past year or two because I wanted to be up close and personal with my waiting audience. 

In other words, I want to respond back to people especially now that I have my new title "Advice Columnist" at, which has proven to be a great success. 

Even though has proven to be a success, for many when it comes to asking questions, most people are intimidated or afraid to ask questions because they don't want people to know that they don't know everything and that is a major problem in this country.

When we were young, many parents taught kids to sit there and be quiet, however, if you are not asking questions, then chances are you will never get all the answers you need to become an EMPOWERED individual, which should be your ultimate goal.

This country is plagued with myths, mis-information, old wives tales, and urban legends.  People are inundated with information especially today because of social media and many people don't know what to believe so at, we are setting the record straight by providing accurate and factual information on how to move forward.

Before this year I had joined close to 100 groups on, which really did not make sense.  However, I was added to most of the groups once everyone saw the powerful info I was sending around the internet with my empowerment company,  

Many groups had invited me to be a part of their think tanks and communities where they were really trying to reevaluate their lives to manifest the greatness and joys of life.  Others are choosing not to even be a part of and I can't blame them.  

I was talking back and forth on to a young sister the other day and she said she has two kids with autism and the other one has seizures.  So being a Non-GMO Health and Wellness Coach, I politely invited her to join our health group on, National Non-GMO Health Movement, or read my health blog to learn more about Genetically Modified Organisms (GMOs).  

But still she wanted to be argumentative when I told her that Genetically Modified Organisms (GMOs) were causing a lot of the brain issues today such as autism, brain seizures, brain cancer, mental health issues, brain fog, bipolar disorder, Alzheimer's, and Parkinson's disease.

I learned through extensive research that GMO foods are affecting the lives of many people today especially their brains because of the heavy metals in processed foods.

However, I am not one to sit there and drill it in anyone's head.  I learned a long time ago that you can take the horse to the water but you can't make him drink it so I don't argue with these types of individuals.  The information is out's not hid under a rock!

When I first became a Non-GMO Health and Wellness Coach, several years ago, there was no information on, or even on, the largest search websites on the internet, on GMOs but all you have to do now is sit down and put in the words GMOs, Genetically Modified Organisms, Genetically Altered, Genetically Engineered, and FrankenFoods -- and educate yourself.

I have 3 timelines.  One with my old high school friends and their families.  On another timeline I try to post positive and motivational postings and my e-newsletter.  And on the other timeline I post my e-newsletter and send comical pictures of dogs, cats and other things that just don't make sense. 

I have close to 5,000 friends on two of my timelines, and I might have talked to less than 20 of these individuals over the last year because I just don't know these people.  So I don't blame anyone when they refuse to join or any social media website.

We know that the government is using to spy on individuals and many people are being denied jobs and other opportunities because of their posts on  Others, especially young people, are bullied online and many end up taking their own lives because of this. 

The internet and social media has done nothing but empowered cyber bullies.  These cyber bullies hide behind social media to carry out 'mean-spirited' practices against others especially young people, senior citizens, the disabled, minorities, or people they just don't like.

Even Melissa Harris-Perry, one of the smartest black women on TV, said she is being harassed and bullied on twitter.  So if a smart sister like that is being bullied online, you can only imagine what kids go through.

And don't forget that Tamar Braxton is being bullied over social media where people are saying she looks like a muppet.  After initially being called this by a new singer, now others are using social media to do this.  These are just bullies!

The problem is so severe that there has even been Cyber Bullying Apps created to monitor and stop cyber bullying.  If we can't use social media to build up this country, then we should not use it at all.

And face it - many people on and other social media sites are just wasting their time.  Remember people do need interactions with others because people are social creatures and no one is an island. 

Humans do better when they have the company and support of others, however, social media can help but it can also hinder you from living the dreams you always wanted to live especially if you become addicted to these social media websites.

Mobile technology and having a hand-held device has made it easier to go on and off of and other social media websites -- but at the end of your day, you need to ask yourself how productive have you been in your life?  Is social media advancing or hindering you from living your dreams? 

We invite you to get on the information highway and join our mailing list and also sign up your family members, friends, neighbors and colleagues at one of these websites -
and - because one day too - I might be gone from and other social media sites because we all know many people come into our lives - not just for a reason - but sometimes only for  a season.  

Meanwhile you can find me on with my three timelines and my 4 groups - 1) I Support Youth Entrepreneurs; 2) The National Non-GMO Health Movement; 3) EEOC Secrets; and 4) Oprah Life Class Empowerment Group.  

Also look for me on other social media such as,Linkedin.comInstagram.comPinterest.comGoggle, etc.

Cathy Harris is an Advice Columnist at, an Empowerment and Motivational Speaker, Non-GMO Health and Wellness Expert, Self-Publishing and Business Coach and the author of over 20 non-fiction books and can be contacted through her empowerment company, Angels Press, P.O. Box 19282, Austin, TX, 78760,, 
She is available for seminars, workshops, webinars and coaching at

Copyright 2015 Cathy Harris. All Rights Reserved 

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Why You Need to Join Groups in Your City and Build Thriving Communities

by Advice Columnist Cathy Harris,

Do You Need A Helping Hand?

Why You Need to Join Groups in Your City 
and Build Thriving Communities
by Cathy Harris,, Advice Columnist

June 10, 2015

As a business owner every once in a while you have to look at your business to see what is working and what is not working and as of today, I am abandoning my long e-newsletters.  The last two e-newsletters, for Mother's Day and Father's Day, were extremely long and I knew that upfront, even before several of my readers told me that.

I do listen to my readers and their feedback so keep it coming. I also know a lot of people don't like to read.  Many people are visual and they have to see and hear something so this is another reason I am abandoning my long e-newsletters to prepare for more upcoming Cathy Harris TV visual presentations.  

Also sending out an e-newsletter every 30 days is no way to keep people motivated so as an Empowerment and Motivational Speaker, I am going back to short posts every 2 or 3 weeks or when I feel like I have something relevant to say but still I don't plan on overcrowding any inboxes.  

Building a new audience as a speaker on the ground, unlike the internet, is not always easy.  I have been in Austin since July 2014, a week before the 4th  of July, but when I introduce myself on the ground at events, I tell others that I have only been here for a short time.    

This is because when I arrived here in Austin last July 2014, I had to finish up several writing projects and that was my priority so the only places I ventured out into were grocery stores, restaurants, gyms and parks. 
As an Empowerment Speaker one of the things that I don't lack is focus, unlike many others who know they should be doing something, at this point in my life I am pretty focused on what my life and business needs to look like. 

I have also spent many hours recording audiobooks in my new home recording studio while I am busy taking out all the glitches from my upcoming empowerment webinar series and seeking to start "The Cathy Harris Show" on a regular basis several days a week.  If you would like to be a guest email me at with the topic for discussion.

I had to get  "The New CEO: 185 Easy-To-Set Up Businesses for Youth and Adult Entrepreneurs"  released as an e-book and paperback because I knew people really needed that book.  Face it until many people, especially many youths today, realize that business ownership is their way out, they will continue to suffer.   

I had started working on the book 2 years earlier but I wasn't really in a hurry to finish it until I physically moved out of Atlanta after 20 years in January 2013.  I spent an entire year on the road taking my National Humanitarian Tour to 15 states and I witnessed first-hand the deplorable conditions of people in this country, especially Seniors and children, so I knew right then and there that the book had to be a priority - so PROJECT COMPLETE!!!

The book  "Recession Survival Guide: How To Get Back Into The Driver's Seat" was another project that had to go from an e-book to paperback because many people, especially Seniors, who are suffering in this country, still don't know what an e-book (also called "digital book") is and many will tell you they still need to feel a paperback book in their hands.  Therefore, I sat out to rerelease this book as a paperback because the book will show you how to keep more money in your pocket -- while it teaches you how to get back into the driver's seat - so PROJECT COMPLETE!!!

Many people are continuing to wait around to see if the economy will get better but they need to get out of that waiting mode and get out there and make something happen in their life.  Despite what you might think, there are a ton of opportunities in this fallen economy but these opportunities will not just knock on your door.

The book  "The Failure of Homeland In-Security: The Government's Dirty Little Secrets from an Insider"
was extremely hard to finish and release as a paperback because it took me back into an abusive workplace mindset so while working on this book, I had to work on myself mentally and physically by eating good brain foods while I engaged in daily exercises for my brain such as yoga and meditations. 

I retired 10 years ago, in 2005, from my job as an Customs Inspector and despite becoming a whistleblower
"The Cathy Harris Story," 15 years ago, what happened to me after blowing the whistle, the retaliation -- still seems like yesterday.   

So it was an extremely painful book to release as a paperback but now everyone has my story  "The Cathy Harris Story: A Whistleblower's Victorious Journey to Justice" and now the stories of what women international travelers went through when they returned to this country.  Both books are now released as e-books and paperback books - so PROJECT COMPLETE!!!

I suspect this will not be the last that we will hear about abuses by Customs and Border Protection (, under the Department of Homeland Security (, because I am being contacted by travelers from all over the country stating that they are being abused by this agency.  All these travelers will have in the future are my books in order to teach them how to fight back - so help me spread the word!

I was working on two books at one time but I don't really advise anyone to ever do that!  It can be quite overwhelming so pick a writing project and complete it before moving on to another one.  

As I was finishing up all the writing projects, I continued to build my loyal online audience and provide them with great tools on how to move forward through my empowerment articles, e-newsletters and coaching services.

Now that I am taking a break from writing books, my freelance inspirations are flourishing.  Every day I wake up with topics to write freelance articles about and don't forget that freelance articles can be turned into books.  

After staying focused and completing all my projects and still being unfamiliar with my new city, Austin, a few weeks back I realized it was just time to meet others locally on the ground to see exactly what Austin had to provide for the future of my business and -- life -- and I have been pleasantly surprised about all the business opportunities the city offers.

The way I met others initially was becoming involved in the groups.  Austin has an abundance of these groups with many being maintained by entrepreneurs and for those of you who don't know it, in order to be successful as an entrepreneur, you need to form business alliances and strategic partnerships with other entrepreneurs.  

Being a solo business owner is fine but at the end of the day, if you really want to move your business to the next level, you need the support of others especially other business owners.

You do want to be careful meeting people nowadays, however, groups are not like meeting someone from or, where you stand a chance of being at risk for a crime.  Just make sure the groups are in a public setting and not at someone's home unless you received the referral from someone you know.   

The groups can be used to move your life and business in the right direction.  We are using the groups in Austin to build a holistic community especially with our "Law of Attraction" group and I am glad to be a part of it.  

Remember no one is an island and people need social interactions in their lives so go to and put in key words to find people in your city to meet and form long-lasting relationships with or to form business alliances or strategic partnerships with. 

You can put in key words such as Holistic Communities, Non-GMO, Gluten Free, Raw Foods, Law of Attraction, Energy Healing, Boomertime, Book Clubs, Dance Clubs, Bike Clubs, Social Outings, Business Women Over 30, Business Women Over 40 -- the sky is the limit on groups you can find and become an active part of.

Don't forget you can form your own group.  The membership fees are $18.00 a month but you can ask others in the group to donate at least $10.00 for the entire year.  And the group will offer you a chance to form at least 3 different groups at a special rate so again it is a great way to meet people in your city.  

My youngest daughter who likes to move around told me she had moved to some city and formed her own group and even though only 5 people came to her meetup, she has now formed a lifetime friendship with at least two of these individuals -- so a lot of good people monitor these groups.  

Now there should be no more excuses why you can't form thriving communities in your city and move forward by using the groups.  To read more about how communities are set up read "How To Take Control of Your Own Life: A Self-Help Guide To Empowering Your Family and the Entire Community" (Series 1) -- available as an e-book or paperback.  Good luck!


Cathy Harris, Speaker, Author, Trainer
Angels Press, CEO, President & Publisher
National Non-GMO Health Movement
P.O. Box 19282
Austin, TX 78760
(512) 909-7365 (Lectures, Seminars, Workshops) (Empowerment & Publishing Company) (Advice Columnist) (The Cathy Harris Story)

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Why I Won't Tolerate Women Who Criticize, Complain and Gossip

By Advice Columnist Cathy Harris,

May 7, 2015

I am staying true to my readers when I made the statement that this year my motto will be "It's Time To Come Clean in 2015."  I wanted to finish this article for my Women's History Month e-newsletter since many women would be reading it but I did not finish it on time -- so I am publishing it now especially for all women.

I grew up watching my mother, day-in and day-out, gossiping up a storm on the telephone with her female friends.  Something about it never sat right with me and this could also be another reason that my mother and I never had a close relationship.

I grew up in rural Georgia.  I was the youngest daughter with 3 older sisters (9 kids total), two in particular that my mother and father idealized.  As the youngest daughter, I was able to sit back and watch the dynamics of my family play out and this is how I became a good listener. 

Not only was I the youngest daughter with 3 younger brothers, I was the family's black sheep.  Being the family's black sheep is no longer a negative thing.  Somehow I just knew early on that being the family's black sheep would propel me into greatness.  You can never let anyone define your level of greatness - so define it yourself.  

What it did was allow me to live life on my own terms.  Eventually after high school I left home and never returned for the next 20 years.  During that time, my father, who was a functional alcoholic, passed away. 

I chose not to be a part of my family's life because of the negativity I experienced growing up.  Making this decision was right for me in order to hold onto my own sanity and I am sure many people today would agree with me when I make the statement that "Your friends could be your family - blood has nothing to do with it!"

After my daughters turned 13 and 14, I eventually decided to move back home to the same state that I grew up in -- so they could be around my family before they graduated high school and went off to college.  However, the bond and nurturing my daughters hoped for never surfaced especially from their grandmother.  I saw the disappointment on their faces when they realized that it would be as good as it would get.

My mother passed away 3 years ago and I spent the last few weeks of her life by her bedside sitting with her so I was able to make peace with my decision for choosing to move away from home and not stay in touch with them.  

Well that's my story and I have no remorse about how I chose to live my life.  As I age, there is one thing I know for sure - that I am responsible for my own life and actions and when you reach a certain point in your life, you have to set standards for your own life.  I will no longer put up with others especially women who criticizes, complains and gossip.  They will never be in my circle of acquaintances.

You see people everyday who are frustrated with their lives, especially many women.  Instead of taking action to change many situations in their lives, they criticize, complain or gossip about everything and everyone under the sun.  They do this in their own communities and also on the internet. 

When I first got on the internet, I use to forward negative articles, pictures and clips of African Americans and others like everyone else.  But now I no longer do this because there is enough forces put into place for others to do this.  

I am not saying don't forward articles, pictures, and videos around the internet that can educate a new generation but what I am saying is because we do live in a digital age, technology has essentially made it easier for us to educate others, so let's try to build instead of breaking down the next generation.  

Everyone need to understand that "readers become leaders," so therefore, we must educate a new generation of readers.  Our ancestors fought and died for the right to read (and write) but yet we are not engaging in one of the best privileges that we will ever have that we can take into our golden years.  To get lost in a good book is like going into another world.  It is undescribable!

The person I am today is because of the books that I read and the books that I write.  One book I read said when you gossip about someone you are actually committing "little murders" by defaming that person's character.  You are gossiping about them because you can't get an audience with that person.  And that sounds pretty accurate - right?

There is a book that was written by a pastor/speaker and I would like for all women (and men) to read it.  For those who don't like pastors, believe me this book is different.  So don't let the fact that it was written by a pastor, keep you from doing the work in the book. 

The book was given to me by my youngest daughter years ago entitled "A Complaint Free World."  After reading the book you should order the purple bracelets and try to go 3 weeks straight without criticizing, complaining and gossiping.  Most people can't do that!   Remember it takes 2 to 3 weeks to form new habits.  If you can do this, it will bring more peace, joy and happiness into your life. 

It works because it worked for me years ago and this book has remained on my list as one of my top 5 most favorite books of all time.  I recently bought the audiobook version so every month, I take time to listen to parts of it to remind me of how I need to stay on track and not complain, criticize and gossip.  We are all a work in progress so don't beat yourself up if you have to read the book several times to actually get it.  

We are only on this earth a short time and everyone needs to decide today, whether they will be a part of the problem or a part of the solution.  It's never too late to transform your life and create the type of life that you love.  The choice is simple!  Don't choose to be a part of any generation that continues to 'break the spirit' of the common day man.

Cathy Harris is an Advice Columnist at, an Empowerment and Motivational Speaker and the author of over 20 non-fiction books and can be contacted through her empowerment company, Angels Press, P.O. Box 19282, Austin, TX 78760, Phone: (512) 909-7365, Website:, Email:  She is available for lectures, seminars and workshops at